NCFM Chicago Chapter Member Lori Debolt, Feminism, #MeToo and Guilty After Being Proven Innocent
19 was a crazy, good time in my life! And Dallas was the perfect place to escape to and “find myself”. After bowling one night, and I’m sure this last minute, unplanned road trip was more alcohol induced than anything, my friends and I drove down to the coast of Galveston. The exact same spot where I’m standing today!
Back then I was only trying to find myself. I totally wanted to join the Air Force. My grandfather was in the Air Force, shot down in WWII. Yes, I wanted to fly and serve! But, my High School counselor broke my already weak spirit and said I’d make a really good secretary. Head roll! “Fuck that” wasn’t a term I used back then! I was determined NOT to become a secretary. A job that degraded women? Hell no! Imagine the slap in my face when I landed my first job in Dallas—AS A SECRETARY! I just wanted to fly and here I was grounded, at 19, in a gender specific role.
Back then the women’s movement meant something. Today? We have the MeToo. As a survivor myself, I cannot fully embrace this movement. Especially after a run in with Amber.
I may get a lot of heat for posting this, but it’s something I feel led by God to say. Women, in advancing our equality we have left behind numerous casualties. Men. Our boys and men. They are laying damaged all along the path of this destructive movement. To say that it’s a victory when 8 men are found guilty of rape yet 2 innocent men are imprisoned for false accusations is a travesty! And it does nothing but devalue the original movement.
Innocent until proven guilty used to be the bedrock of our judicial system. Yet we have prosecutors fighting for a win instead of justice. We have people hanging out in the shadows of the women’s movement waiting to hold up the shield when they mess up in life. Alibi, revenge! Accuse them of rape. Accuse them of abusing the child in divorce situations. Accuse them of domestic violence. For them—it’s ok to turn the story around and accuse the men for the very thing they themselves have done. Because Yes! They can safely hide in the movement and hold up that banner when they know they will walk away free from the consequences of their very own abusive lies and actions.
Here I am. 55! 36 years later. It isn’t about “finding myself” anymore. Today, it’s about listening to God and going in to dark waters. It’s about helping men find their equality! It’s about exposing the dark side of the women’s movement. It’s about putting the False Accusers in the spotlight. It’s about saving our boys and men.
Equalism! Misandy be damned. Men need their voices heard now more than ever. And with God’s help, I’m going to do just that. Hate me if you will, but our men deserve equality too!
I’m coming in so very late to this battle. Nonetheless, I am here. We are legally fighting back against a false accuser while my son sits in a cell. This women, I’ll call her AP, has 2 daughters. The father of the eldest lives out of state. AP left him. She took their child and moved to our state in hopes of finding a modeling career. (Documented on the forever net). Parental alienation to the T! I’ve spoken with him and he won’t do anything. He has no money and what little relationship he has with his daughter is not worth losing. He’s afraid he’ll lose his daughter forever so while he tries to save what little bond he has with his sweet daughter, AP is completely free to control him. The second daughter was born in our state and I’ve spoken with the father. He has spent thousands to retain the right to be a father. AP has recently accused him of child abuse. He’s fighting back and quickly running out of money.
My son? He was 23 at the time. 5 years ago he attended a summer cookout at a friend’s condo. AP was 32. She was the neighbor who came to the party. Several times throughout the night she walked back to her condo, always with a male, to “check” on her daughters.
Several witnesses stated that they saw her intimately talking with my son. He accepted her invitation to stay the night with her. She left the party and returned some time very late in the night. Leading him back to her condo, she inspected to make sure the kids were asleep in their own beds and proceeded to lead him into her bathroom. She initiated consensual sex by removing his clothes and taking him into the shower for sex. They then went to bed together.
Her daughter had to wake her up the next morning because she slept past her alarm and had to get to work. She wakes up and her little daughter was there in bed with them. She left the condo to run to her neighbor’s condo (woman who has the cookout party) she reruns and take an hour showering and getting ready for work. Puts on fresh underwear…keep note of this because it comes up later in this event. And proceeded to load her girls into her car. Gave my son a ride home and went to work.
Her youngest daughter asks AP why she was bumping butts with another boy. She then became concerned. Remember, she has two daughters. Both dads were constantly having to fight to be able to be a dad. Custody issues.
Later that evening, she goes in for a rape kit. The dad of the youngest was trying to get the story when she came back to his house to pick up the daughter. It was his visitation night and was concerned that she was coming back so late to pick up the daughter. She cried to him that she had been raped and told just a bit of the story to him. The “bumping butt” sex scene that the daughter saw was actually from earlier in the night when she had sex with another man in her bed while her daughter was also in the bed. Remember, my son had sex with AP in the shower—not in the bed.
Police arrive at her condo to complete the investigation. During this, the dad of the little girl called the police. The investigator called him back while he was at AP’s condo. The police got more of the story from him. The dad was concerned that his little girl was molested too. After the call, the police instructed AP to take the little girl in for testing too.
Ok! Let’s back up a bit. What rapist stays the night with a woman? What “victim” wakes up with a man, leaves her 2 daughter alone while she leaves the condo and then takes an hour to shower? What “victim” gives the rapist a ride home? What “victim”, who wakes up with a man in her bed AND her daughter goes in for a rape kit but does not take the little daughter in for testing too?
The rape results? TWO DNA!! Clean underwear had 2 DNA. The second man? Sex with him in the bed must have occurred earlier in the night. My son testified in detail. AP? She testified that she went to bed alone and does not remember anything. The jury bought it. But rape shield laws, incorrectly applied in this case, prevented us from brining in all the evidence. She lost custody of her kids after that night because she neglected to properly supervise her daughters. That evidence was also denied. The eldest daughter could not identify the defendant during trial. She saw my son once and the trial was 4 years after the fact. She testified that she was never shown pictures of my son during the 4 years. When she couldn’t identify my son, the prosecutor pointed over to the table where my son was sitting his attorneys—a male attorney and a female attorney. Prosecutor then asked “How about here?” Do you see the defendant here. She then identified my son. Really? Our objection was over ruled.
Suppressed evidence—bed sheets were also not brought in. Investigation for the second man has ceased. A person of interest refused to cooperate so the police stopped investigating. . Numerous objections overruled. Numerous objections from the prosecutor were granted. Jury deceived.
I’m in this fight for the long haul. I know first hand what this has done to my son. His family—a wonderful women with three kids of her own are displaced now because they couldn’t afford to stay on their rental home. 3 kids—my grandchildren who love my son deeply. All are without my son. A woman who loves my son. A family still very much in love, torn apart.
The prosecutor introduced the MeToo during jury selection, in opening and in his closing. I will fight against this “women’s” movement to my very last breath. MeToo has failed the real rape victims by not standing up against false accusers. God will help us shine the light on his story. God will shine the light on all men falsely accused of rape. Men—anyone falsely accused of rape and child abuse—will have justice. With God’s Lighthouse, I will not stop until this abusive and severe miscarriage of justice ends!!!!
Stand strong, men! Women, we must use our voices to send a strong message!! Our men and boys are being abused and wrongly accused! For far too long!!!