Author: Tom Givens
Although the subject of women in the MRM is not currently a hot button issue, I wanted to write a small missive to them from a nearly worn out old hand. In part, what I want to do is thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am well aware that for some of you, the road has been as long as mine (*cough*typhon*cough*) and something like this has been a long time coming. So along with my thanks comes an apology for its tardiness.
It is a comfort to know that, indeed not ALL women are ‘like that’ and even better some of you stand up and say something, and dammit they are quite often good something’s to say.
And in no small measure it is precisely because you are not men, your unique perspective (as regards men’s issues, being fully aware of them) on men being ‘outside’ observation. This is most definitely not to disregard or diminish in any way your viewpoints, but rather a recognition of the value of those outside viewpoints in realizing what is going on. As an example, it never occurred to me the level to which feminism infantilized women, until I read an article criticizing same.
So allow me to attempt to return the favor.
Going very far back, in the Dark Age of the MRM there was an influx of women asking what women are supposed to do. Essentially, these women asked for a belief system, a label they could attach themselves to, that would embody their belief in equality without demonizing men.
Some of these women stuck around and proudly call themselves MRAs. More of them stuck around but balked at calling themselves MRAs. And a lot of newcomer women tend to see a lot of unmasked anger, and get scared off. Which of course leads to calls for moderation, which isn’t going to happen…
This cycle has endlessly repeated for decades, seemingly every week on r/mensrights.
You can see the dilemma.
Then I noticed a new subreddit called ‘lady MRAs’. It’s a small, but growing group that I wish every success for. And when I look at the writings and videos of the higher profile female MRAs there’s one thing that strikes me as a common denominator. These women ARE what feminism pretends to be.
There is a growing body of work from these women – self aware and empathetic work that views men as partners, not competitors – that deserves to be recognized for what it is…
A replacement ideology for feminism.
Well, ok, not so much an ideology as a label to attach to basically acting like an adult, and ‘owning your shit’. But you get my meaning. What you are doing is piggybacking on the MRM to formulate a new understanding for women. An answer to “what do you want me to be?” For the record…piggyback away!
I would view it as a personal favor for all men if you would consider a humble request though…
When the MRM was a few hundred guys grumbling away on discussion boards, we never got around to finding a catchy name. This means we have to describe ourselves with an acronym, with which most people are unfamiliar. In hindsight, I think that was a mistake on our part. So, could you guys think up a cool name for yourselves? Because here’s the kicker…
You are forming the basis of a future belief system. You are laying the foundation for increased harmony between the sexes. You are the bridge between men and women. And what you write now may indeed show up in the textbooks of the future.
If you ask me that responsibility couldn’t be in better hands.
Original Story on AVFM
These stories are from AVoiceForMen.com.
(Changing the cultural narrative)